Within/Without

I’ve been reading a book on how to release fibroids. Mine are really large and since I’ve been losing weight, they are closer to the surface of my belly and more painful. A lot of the recommendations in the book I had tried before but didn’t work for my can fibroids. You can’t try everything at once. You’ll never know what worked. So.... this month... and by month, I mean cycle to cycle.... I’ve been trying Noni. Folks swear that Noni can cure cancer and regrow severed limbs. That it was personally blessed by Dr Seni to cure all the ills of the world. Well.... nothing. I’ve been taking supplements because the juice is really nasty. You’d expect something from Hawaii to be delicious. It’s not. And I don’t really know what I’m expecting with the ”release” of the fibroids. I don’t really know what to expect. I mean are they just gonna dissolve? Will I have to birth the big ones? Do I really want any of that? I do know that I have lost more than $50 pounds and my waist measurement has ...

... because I've been having a problem with eczema. The dermatologist noticed I had cats and thought that maybe I had a cat allergy. I do. But I also have several allergies. It's like I'm allergic to life! These are my results. There are less things I'm not allergic to. I'm going to have to change my entire life. I have changed some things through the years... But clearly it hasn't been enough. The doctor also said that since these allergies have undiagnosed for so long, they are intense enough to cause me to go into anaphylactic shock and they have probably contributed to my other chronic health issues... i.e. fibroids. But since he's an allergist he did't want to set that in stone. I am allergic to all the pollen, grass, food (like all the damn food), bugs, dust and my 2 cats. I'm so unhappy, I want to cry. But that would be unproductive. So.... here is a tentative plan. and I mean really tentative... since I just got my diagnosis today ...

I found dress that ADORED last summer. The problem is.... it’s too big!!!! Yes, too big! I’m so geeked! I also made the dress. I don’t normally like to discard my made items but I will this time. And I will feel great to do so!!!!

Peace, New Year, new me and all that bullshit! So I made a few resolutions.... Yoga... Meditation.... Water.... And as always lose weight. The yoga is going slow. For some reason, it makes me dizzy if I jump right in. Plus I want to make this a lifelong thing and not just a temporary change. I've been promised long life from 3 different entities. I'm in no rush. So I'm starting with developing a regular/daily practice of sun and moon salutations. The diet.... yeesh! I have come to the conclusion that not all diets work for all people. Last year I determined to lose 20 lbs/year until I'm 50. I lost it, but did't maintain it. Oh well. Lessons learned. This has caused me to look back on past diets to see what was successful. I had real success on 2 diets. Weightwatchers and Cyber trim. Both plans have changed. But I'm not about that weigh in meeting life. Maybe later. I've decided to do the carb cycling that the cyber trim offered. I lost weight on that a...

Peace, I'm a sit here and type and act like I ain't been gone a hot second.... One of my New Years Resolutions was regular meditation. I find meditation useful because it puts me in a pleasant headspace. Once I figured out how to do it in a way that worked for me, I enjoyed it immensely. But the lives most Americans live is super busy and small things that we do for pleasure are frowned upon if they don't generate gold. But since my life has taken on a different tenure, I'm reincorporating meditation back into my rotation. So this morning is cold AF. You know it's cold when you hear the heat really kicking in and the house is still chilly. Our home is pretty tight (not drafty) so for us to really feel the cool means its cold outside. And regardless of the balance, I strongly dislike cold weather. So I awoke.... and right now that's when I'm planning to meditate.... with the thoughts of summer and that made me happy. I wish to be happy. So I began my ...

Peace Y'all, Fibroids are benign tumors that grow in or on the uterus. It is something that American Black women suffer from (I'm not sure that melaninated people in other countries suffer from fibroids). Other factors include family history, never had children, and overweight. I am all of that. I got diagnosed with fibroids at age 28. The doctor found a small one during an annual visit. My mother had really bad fibroids. Doctors told her she couldn't have more children after my older brother. Clearly they were wrong because I'm here. Also in the 70's they didn't know that fibroids were benign. So when my mother birthed me, she also had a hysterectomy in the same surgery. Because I have fibroids I have PAINFUL and long cycles. I BLEED. I can fill up a super overnight pad in 2 hours on a heavy flow day. I have about 4-5 HEAVY days and then another 3 days light. I only hurt on the heavy days. I lose so much blood, that it has landed me in the hospital. When yo...